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Showing posts from June, 2009

cross-stitching

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I have been out of touch these days -my usual excuse for ignoring my blog-. I'm in my hometown, fairly busy, heavily uninspired. I know my readers trust in my ability to glean writing topics out of everyday situations. And I'd like to trust in myself too, but maybe not this time. I've been doing cross-stitch work. It calms me down. Not that I'm not calm -because I really am-, but it allows me to stay calm and out of the daily flurry that takes over everyone. People seem to worry about the smallest issues and I see them as petty concerns when I look from the outside, but do I worry about the same petty things in my own life, which is on hold for now? But then who am I to say anything? I spend my time pouring over an Aida cloth, pricking my needle from one tiny hole to the other, working my way X by X to a cute bird figure.

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I'm at House Cafe Bebek waiting for friends to get out of work to meet me, and I'm watching five guys who have a dog that keeps barking at passers-by, who laugh and talk loudly about things that won't fill a fig's seed (turkish idiom meaning trivial) and I'm getting annoyed at their attitude. Some of the people here are very spoiled.  It's awfully hot outside, and I'm tired of wandering around.  Was this the Istanbul that I left? Was it always this chaotic with speeding cabs (I still hate cabs), bad traffic, cigarette smoke everywhere, and loud streets? I know I was missing certain parts of it (correct, Bosphorus) but I think enjoying this city is highly correlated with having a home to go back to - in other words, feeling anchored in all this turbulence. When I don't have a door to close and leave what bothers me outside, the city gets to me. At least, this time it did. Let's hope for a better impression next time.  Setting negativity aside, it was