Sunday. Woke up all alone -pretty alone compared to the past week i spent with him-, stepped out to get some coffee beans ground at Starbucks, stopped by Paul's for bread, grabbed a Milliyet to get the sunday news, came back home, with the radio still on because i like it that way, that the door opens to funky radio Oxygen music. Then i put on Sia's album. Breakfast with Sia. Breakfast on my own- although heavenly what with the delicious Paul bread and olive oil, french press and good cheese, i wondered what he could be doing, thinking, looking at. New York skies from an airplane? Some gorgeous flight hostess with too much make-up on? While Sia sang, "Gone away, yesterday- today is a brand new day." Read the papers, became temporarily informed. Tried to digest the past week we spent together, all those sights and scents and sounds. Eating sea-mussels off a tray on Galata bridge. Watching the mosque above, watching my mind wander as the my two favorite guys in the world smoke nargile and visit philosophical realms. It is cold in here today. I'm making to-do lists, i'm trying to keep myself occupied. "Welcome to the church of what's happening now" the music tells me. I realize we are still as innocent as last saturday when i got those white roses.


irem said…
you are lucky (am i saying this again?) for the white roses, if for nothing else...sometimes i have this slight longing for the roses, and the expectant eyes and the surrounding arms and everything else that "naturally" comes.

but just for a minute; then the feeling disappears without a trace. those were in another lifetime. so very surprising to see that you can indeed change, and without realizing...

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