Still, we human beings are intricately wired to suffer when we have been rejected by a loved one, and for good evolutionary reasons. I believe romantic love is one of three primary mating drives. The sex drive evolved to enable our ancestors to seek intercourse with any remotely appropriate individual. Romantic love developed to enable our forebears to focus their attention on preferred partners, thereby conserving precious mating time and energy. And long term attachment evolved to motivate mates to rear their babies as a team. So falling in love is one of the most important (and powerful) things we do; it profoundly affects our social and genetic future.
As a result, we are built to suffer terribly when love fails-- first to protest the departure and try to win the beloved back, and later to give up utterly, dust ourselves off and redirect our energy to fall in love again. We are likely to find evidence of any combination of these myriad motivations and emotions as we examine the rejected brain in love.

-Helen Fisher


ozlem said…
i found this really interesting and true however it is still not enough to explain, is it just a motivation problem? by the way why "dumped"?
Dumped! is the title of the article bidicim, it's about the break-up psychology and the evolution of man in the face of love hurt.
s. said…
i strongly reccommend Plato's Symposium. In fact I am going to pick it up and re-read now...

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